Jade Seashell

This is a series of exercises that one of my female clients have done.  Previously, she was too shy to approach men, but because of this exercise, she has desensitized herself and now she is not concerned while talking to men anymore.

          Let's call her Linda so that it's easier to read and understand (in order to protect my client's privacy, that's not her real name, but she has given me the permission to reveal this process).

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          Linda was walking down the road alone while holding a folder full of documents/pens in her hands.  She practiced these exercises on many different men.  When she did Exercise 1 for three times, she wasn't concerned about that anymore.  Then she did Exercise 2 repeatedly till she felt comfortable with it.  And she moved on to the next exercise ....

Exercise 1:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

Exercise 2:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

When she received the pen from the guy, her hand touched the guy's hand "accidentally".

Exercise 3:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

When she received the pen from the guy, her hand touched the guy's hand "accidentally".

Then Linda asked the man, "What's the time?"  The guy said, "It's 10:30".

Exercise 4:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

When she received the pen from the guy, her hand touched the guy's hand "accidentally".

Then Linda asked the man, "What's the time?"  The guy said, "It's 10:30".

Linda said, "Thank you. I like your watch/phone." (depends on whether this guy was wearing a watch or only had a phone to check the time).

The guy said, "Oh, thanks!"

Exercise 5:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

When she received the pen from the guy, her hand touched the guy's hand "accidentally".

Then Linda asked the man, "What's the time?"  The guy said, "It's 10:30".

Linda said, "Thank you. I like your watch/phone." (depends on whether this guy was wearing a watch or only had a phone to check the time).

The guy said, "Oh, thanks!"

Linda said, "Obviously you have good taste and understand gadgets, so could you recommend a gift that I can buy for my brother's birthday?"

The guy made some recommendations.

Exercise 6:

When Linda noticed a good-looking man walking near her, she "accidentally" dropped a pen on the road and kept walking.  She made sure the man was able to see it.  The guy picked up the pen and came to her, saying, "Hey, you dropped your pen."

Linda said, "Thank you so much!"

When she received the pen from the guy, her hand touched the guy's hand "accidentally".

Then Linda asked the man, "What's the time?"  The guy said, "It's 10:30".

Linda said, "Thank you. I like your watch/phone." (depends on whether this guy was wearing a watch or only had a phone to check the time).

The guy said, "Oh, thanks!"

Linda said, "Obviously you have good taste and understand gadgets, so could you recommend a gift that I can buy for my brother's birthday?"

The guy made some recommendations.

Linda said, "Where can I find a similar watch/phone?"/"How can I get to XYZ shopping mall?"

The guy either gave her direction or took her there!

         Other steps can continue!

         The result: some of these men didn't engage; some of these men reacted well; some of these men asked for Linda's phone number!

         This series of exercises is based on modern psychology (desensitization and layering), and these can be adapted according to an individual's specific needs.

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